It happened again. You’re in the checkout line, trying to keep your toddler occupied while unloading groceries, when the meltdown begins. It starts small—a whine, a pout—but then escalates into a full-blown tantrum over a candy bar. You feel every eye in the store turn toward you, and your heart races. You wonder, “Why is this happening? And what am I supposed to do now?”
Tantrums are a normal part of childhood development, especially in toddlers and preschoolers. Experts say it’s because young children are still learning how to express their needs and manage big emotions. That doesn’t make it any easier in the moment, though, does it? So there you are, feeling a mix of frustration and embarrassment, trying to figure out your next move.
First, take a deep breath. It might sound too simple to work, but staying calm is the best gift you can give both yourself and your child in moments like these. Kids look to us to understand how to handle emotions, and if you can model calmness, you’re showing them a valuable skill. You crouch down to their level and say, “I know you’re upset because you want the candy. Let’s talk about it when we get home.” They may not stop crying right away, but you’ve planted a seed: their feelings matter, but there are boundaries.
You’ve read somewhere that naming emotions can help kids process them. So you try it. “You’re really mad that we’re not getting candy today,” you say. “It’s okay to feel upset, but yelling won’t change my answer.” To your surprise, they pause, as if considering your words. It doesn’t end the tantrum, but it softens the edge.
Desperate to redirect their attention, you offer them a job. “Would you like to help me pick apples or hold the shopping list?” you ask. They sniffle, looking at you with teary eyes, and finally nod. You hand them the list, and just like that, the storm begins to pass.
Later, when you’re back home, you think about how you could avoid future grocery store meltdowns. Maybe packing a snack next time will help. Or bringing along a small toy to keep their hands busy. You remember a friend mentioning that playtime can be a great way to teach kids about emotions. That evening, you pull out a set of puppets from your latest Play Time Crate and act out a “grocery store scene” together. Your child laughs as the puppets argue over a pretend candy bar, and you talk about how the puppets might handle their big feelings differently. It’s playful, but you can see the wheels turning in their little mind.
The next time you’re in a similar situation, it might not go perfectly. But you’ll have tools in your back pocket: a calm demeanor, words to validate their feelings, and maybe even a distraction or two. One day, you’ll look back on these moments and realize they weren’t just about getting through the grocery store. They were about teaching your child how to navigate the big world—one meltdown at a time.